And, just like that, the second month of quarantine has passed. It’s become a new way to live, though I still can’t bring myself to accept the idea that this is how we are to live forever.
Over the last month, the reality slowly dawned that absent a vaccine, everything that I’ve come to enjoy over the years just isn’t possible anymore. Concerts, theater performances, dining out or whisky tastings, and vacation or work involving travel have all unraveled. As the shelter in place orders were extended once again, the Memorial Day weekend plans dissolved – hotels continue to be closed and the thought of flying to Seattle to board a ferry to Victoria, BC became impossible. A major Whisky event in San Francisco rescheduled to 2021 with little clarity around whether it will actually happen. Celtic Women didn’t actually make contact, but the Oakland theater where the concert was to take place continued to extend their reopening date well past the date of the concert. Billy Joel rescheduled to summer of 2021, and I sadly requested my ticket be refunded. Then a wedding planned for this August was rescheduled to July 2021. The local Shakespeare theater sent a request that tickets be donated as they won’t actually perform this season at all. No word from Andrea Bocelli, but I highly doubt he’ll travel from Italy in mid-June. The trip to Israel in October is not officially off, but seems less and less likely. This year has ended before it really got underway.
My days have become framed by Morning Prayer with the National Cathedral, sporadic bits of work, and running or walking. It’s still quite solitary since my only real interactions are online or the brief stops at grocery stores to pick up necessities. When I moved to the Bay Area, I decided not to really engage locally until I was settled in my new city. My thought at the time was that I didn’t want to make friends, find a church or set up regular social engagements in Oakland, knowing that I wouldn’t ultimately be living there. I thought it would be better to establish a social circle closer to my new home. My physical moved ended up happening at the end of March, well after the shelter in place order was issued. As a result, I never really met anyone and the whole social distancing order became, by default, an established reality for me before my shipment even arrived. It’s a disappointing situation now, but in some ways, I guess a blessing in disguise – I have no enticements to get together with anyone in person.
During this month I thought about what I should be doing with all this extra time on my hands. If things had worked out the way I expected, I would have been taking the BART (train) to work, and therefore likely getting back into my usual reading during commuting. So, I selected a variety of books that I want to read during May and turned to the Kindle. In the past, I’ve struggled with the idea of only reading what comes in that format, and easily switched between printed and electronic books. Since Amazon had stopped shipping ‘non-essential’ items and all the bookstores are closed, I had to deal with the reality that my selection needed to be ‘Kindle only.’ Once again, while this isn’t ideal, the fact that I do have a Kindle and it is possible to find a good selection of options in that format is a definite plus.
While it can be easy to focus on the negative and all the everyday things and events that are gone or put on hold, I have to say that it brings focus and appreciation to everything that went on just before the pandemic struck. Thanksgiving in London with my best friend, Christmas at home in Minnesota, a Baptism in early January, the visit to Grand Cayman Island at the end of January with my sisters, moving to a new city and starting an exciting new job in early February, a weekend in Sonoma and Napa (albeit not running my planned half marathon, but enjoying wine country). All these events are even more precious now when they cannot possibly be repeated. At the time of the trip to Grand Cayman, there was an earthquake just after we left the island. We were excited that we missed it – weren’t we lucky? Two months later, it turns out our luck was actually going on that trip, and not the potential impact of an earthquake.
What will the next month bring? It’s hard to say. As a part of my company’s return to the workplace task force, I fear that this modern day monastic lifestyle will continue for the foreseeable future. Life won’t be back to normal for the several months, and maybe not ever. The city streets are empty; shops closed and people darting to the other side of the sidewalk as we pass each other on our daily excursions. While we are anxious to get outside of our homes, the fear and anxiety permeates encounters on the street or in the shops as we consider whether leaving the relative safety of our homes is actually wise.
On one of my runs, I listened to a BBC radio show on the Pet Shop Boys, and this song struck me. While it wasn’t a recent release, it speaks to the present time (and the video features social distancing – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXgrIuK6Tqc). I’ve not really followed them over the years, but certainly their more recent music speaks to me.
Hold on, hold on
There’s got to be a future
Hold on.
Hold on, hold on
There’s got to be a future
or the world will end today
The sun will melt away
The sky so dark decay
and summer, spring and autumn, winter
melt into a single moment
poured into the past
like a stream run dry at last
Hold on
Hold on
There’s got to be a future
to create and to defend
so the world can never end
Hold on
Things can’t be quite so bad
that all we have and all we had
never were and won’t return
lost in a fire that cannot burn
Hold on
Hold on
Hold on, hold on
There’s got to be a future
or the world will end today
Look around, look around
The rain is falling from the sky
Planes taking off to fly
The swooping birds and barking dogs
Shopping malls and catalogues
Traffic stopped on busy streets
Lovers lying between the sheets
Business models, computer freaks
modern artists, new techniques
Money comes and money goes
Children cry and still suppose
there’s got to be a future
Hold on
Hold on, hold on
There’s got to be a future
or the world will end today
Hold on, hold on
There’s got to be a future
Hold on
